Many have heard about near-death experiences. This is one of my stories which gave me not only Faith but a Knowing. I was born with many difficulties. Though this has
never stopped me from living, loving and hoping; I believe I’m here on earth to
give hope and joy to many with despair.
In my young teenage years I felt like I was alone. Waking up in a hospital room as
the nurses prepped me for one of many surgeries. My heart pounding with sorrow,
it was a few days before my 16th birthday and never been kissed. Sounds like a
cliché, this time in my life with a heart ache. There was a young nurse, he had
caught my eye and yet felt that love would never touch me. It was just another
surgery, another birthday, another day in the hospital.
7:00 AM: I was put on a gurney to take me to surgery. Just like normal, I was asked
to help move over by two nurses. I was making jokes so no one could hear my
silent tears inside my soul. I always keep a stiff upper lip so no one could
ever imagine how frightened I really was at that moment in time. Being on a
cold stretcher which was disguised as a small bed, looking up at a white
ceiling, I always count all the small details as I’m moving forward; it was
always the same way. Watching everyone rush by, some look at me, yet others
just seem as they shouldn’t look at this young girl in a blue cap. I’m
thinking most know where I’m going. The noises around me seemed so familiar,
like the speaker calling out to a doctor or a code, it’s always so busy. In
some ways it is so business like yet people smile as I move by them in the
hallways. As the elevator opened and they push the button to go to the surgical
floor, it felt so cold and all I had was a small blanket with a single sheet on
me, feeling vulnerable
I hear the doors as they open; it’s a mechanical sound as they bring you into the
hallway to wait for the doctors. ‘You want a warm blanket?’ a male voice spoke
to me. It was Carl the young nurse around 23 years old with Reddish hair, Tall
5’11 with a soft voice he had stolen my heart. A 16-year-old crush is so
intense. Carl explained that he could not go into the surgical room with me,
yet he would be watching the surgery. “Anne I’ll see you after the surgery” he
said, as they brought me into the surgical room. He smile and winking at me he
assured me, “You’ll be fine ”. Dr. Craig was a very famous orthopedics
physician and he came out to this small hospital in Glendora, California in
order to keep me from having any more stress. He was my doctor since I was two
years old. He was like father to me in a lot of ways. It’s always so cold in
that room and a lot of people talking softly as if we were in a mortuary. Then
Dr. Craig asked me if I was okay as they put an IV into my arm. They always
asked me to do the same thing “count backwards from one hundred”, as
I felt the anesthesia slowly put me to sleep.
At that time I felt a tremendous weightlessness, hearing voices which seemed so chaotic
yet so far away. Then there was warmth that I could not ever explain. I felt so
peaceful as if time stood still. Feeling others all around me yet not grasping
who they were. It was as though I had friends, relatives, all around me. I was
not afraid. They just stood around me caressing my soul. It was so wonderful,
there was no pain or worries just loving beings all around whispering to me,
‘you’ll just be here for a moment’. Hearing whispers ‘telling me they would see
me again but I have to go back.’ Then I felt my soul pulling into my body.
There was a rush and then a feeling of pain, so different from the wonderful
environment I had just left. I heard nurses all around “Anne can you hear me?”
they seem urgent for an answer from me. I felt my body in pain and them trying
to get my attention again and again, the nurses strongly saying my name “ANNE
can you hear me?” Then my eyes opened slowly and I saw all of them. They
all seemed so relieved when I answered them. I was in the recovery room. I’ve
been here before, always seemed to be the same thing yet somehow this time it
was different. Carl’s voice came to me in gentle warmth of concern “Anne, can
you say my name?” I looked at him and smiled. I was glad to hear his voice, my
heart pounded with some excitement knowing my heartthrob was talking to me.
They took me to my room. My mother was there sitting in a chair next to a window
waiting for me to be fully conscious. Her voice seemed concerned as she asked
me if I wanted some ice. By this time I was awake to some degree and said
“yes mom, I would.” The next day was my birthday, sweet 16. My mother
stayed by my bed the rest of the day. Carl’s head popped in my room and he said
“Young lady never do that again!” as he smiled. I just looked at him
with some confusion. The next day my mother came in with cake and some
presents. The nurses sang happy birthday to me yet the highlight of my birthday
was Carl coming in with three presents. I was so smitten and yet I felt he
could not see me as a woman. Then he winked at me and kissed my forehead “Anne
if you were just a little bit older.” in some ways my heart felt so wonderful.
My thoughts were of my first kiss, even though it was only a small one.
I was told that the anesthesiologist had briefly walked out and they had lost my
heart beat for while thinking I may not come back. Everyone felt so full with
life. I remember the peaceful serenity I had left, in warmth which was beyond
most perceptions. This was one of my experiences of knowing that there is
contentment, so deep that I can never explain it in full detail. Many talk
about the ‘white light’ yet there is so much more. This experience continues to
give me hope, whenever I find fear. I am here on earth to talk about my
experiences and help others Know the joy that is waiting for us when are done
here.
Food for thought